Written by Robert Scucci | Published
I like to stay up late. It’s something I love to do. I can get my work done, fold laundry, work on creative projects, and hit the gym without a soul. My brain works at times that are always in conflict with the early birds, who tend to ignore my lifestyle because for most people, sleep is associated with a red letter that suggests you are lazy and wasting your time. At least that’s what people think in the morning.
Every self-help expert extolls the beauty of waking up at 4 a.m., taking an ice bath, running 10 miles while listening to Tony Robbins audiobooks, all before sunrise. If I never see the sunrise again in my life, I can die a happy man. I’m sure they’re good. I’ll take your word for it. I have not been connected to work this long, and often, I fight for my life.
On the other hand, I get it. Growing up, as my fellow Millennials call it, requires you to be present from time to time. Banks close at 5. Since the epidemic, grocery stores close at 10. The world is not built for Night Owls, and we suffer in silence while trying our best to conform to what most people consider normal behavior. The world was built for the early birds, and they like to brag about how productive they are. They go to bed again at eight o’clock, so how does that sound?
We all have the same 24 hours
I understand this sounds trivial, but let me break it down for you. If someone wakes up at 4 am and goes to bed at 8 pm, he has 16 hours to accomplish what he set out to do. Eight of those hours are devoted to work in most cases, and then you have to consider commuting, eating, self-care, family responsibilities, and yes, even sleep. This kind of life is not only celebrated, it is expected.
But if I want to stay up until 4 in the morning and sleep until noon, people can’t wrap their heads around it. It’s still a 16-hour cognitive cycle, but most people don’t see it that way. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. I agree. You do it. Beyoncé does it. It’s crazy to think that being able to see the sunrise somehow makes you high. Many who wake up in the morning flaunt this as if it were God’s gift to humanity.
The worst part is that every night owl I know, myself included, ends up marrying the first bird. The story is always the same. A night owl uses his phone’s flashlight when he goes to the bathroom so he doesn’t wake anyone up. They turn the doorknob before opening or closing the door so that no loud clicks echo down the hallway. They move around their home because they know they are strange.
Then in the morning it rears its ugly head. Lights are flicked on with careless abandon, kitchen appliances clatter, and doors slam. When the night owl moaned, they were told that they should have gone to bed earlier.
Even worse, if they say they like to sleep until 10 on weekends, their peers think their lives must be chaotic. They must stay up all night playing video games and doing illegal activities or something. They screw up because they refuse, or they just can’t shut up when everyone else shuts up.
Golly, I wish that were true, but I actually do things, like write (which is what I’m doing right now at 1:30 am) because I think better when I know my family is safe and sound and doesn’t need a single thing from me. I can achieve a state of flow I never dreamed of during normal waking hours, and my family is all the better for it!
Accept Your Wires And Let Them Work For You
In a previous professional life, I worked third shift as a line cook. My schedule had me going to work at three in the afternoon and returning home 12 hours later. Since this was before the pandemic and I had a baby at home, I would stop at a 24-hour grocery store after my shift and load up with a week’s worth of groceries in about 15 minutes. Try doing that on a Sunday afternoon with your normal sleep schedule.
It will take two hours, and everyone will be stressed because grocery stores on weekends are absolute hell; people are walking around like boxes, blocking every damn place, the lines are sad, and everything is messy. I took one group, and now we can do other things. Things we love. Just let me squeeze in a power nap, and be good.
In my mind, I was not only maximizing my time by accomplishing work that is normally assigned to nine-to-fivers, I was doing it in peace.
I am lucky to live in a home where this life is respected and respected, because I know that is not the case for everyone. Since my wife wakes up early in the morning, I found myself sleeping there when she got up to go to work, and I knew that I had to take care of our baby (who woke up at seven o’clock) until he got home at noon. Then I take a glorious nap and do it over and over again. Our weekends became more full because we didn’t have to do certain things in the way of time absorption, and we all benefited from it.
Currently, I write and work in audio production, which means I have a flexible schedule that fits my lifestyle, something I’m very grateful for. On any given weekday, I get the kids ready for school, do line checks on my various gigs, plan my day, and take a quick nap before getting to work.
At 10 p.m., when my family is sleeping soundly and I know that all is well in the world, I do my best thinking. There is a complete lack of motivation compared to what most of us experience during the day. High performance in a very difficult time, so you might as well go with it.
When I think about my life, and I hope some of you reading can relate to this, elementary, middle, and high school were sad experiences for me because I was wired to be a Night Owl. It was always like that. I was an average student because my brain doesn’t kick in until the end of the day, and my grades reflect that.
I’ve tried cutting out coffee in the afternoon and taking prescription sleeping pills, but I face and wait for the second big breath, without fail, when the world goes quiet, which means it’s too late. That’s when the circus always kicks into high gear, and I got bored and did something different.
When I was in university, I suddenly became a Dean’s List student because I decided to take night classes. I saw desirable results when I stopped fighting my lines and started embracing them. It’s almost as if some people are destined to hide at night.
Night Owls Are Important Creatures
The hardest part of being a Night Owl is fitting in with everyone. I wear a sleeping mask during the day so our houseplants can grow. Those who don’t have the proper network support struggle because 7am on a Saturday means no sleep, and they have to live up to everyone’s expectations. They are called grumpy and told they have to have a responsible sleep schedule.
If we lived in a different timeline, we would be setting fires and watching out for looters. Our determination to stay awake at night can serve what many people consider a useful purpose.
But in today’s nine-to-five world, our lifestyle is scrutinized because we choose to work when everyone else chooses to rest. However, when we decide to catch up on some Z’s, we are told to get up and do them because “there is more to do.”
What the early birds don’t understand is that we have done it all, just not in their time.
